the Attraction Factor

The tag line in an ad on TV, featuring Ellen DeGeneres, was something like, “inner beauty is nice but outer beauty is what is really important”. This being the total opposite of what we have always been told growing up. I loved the commercial because in addition to being funny, it really is so true. We still are drawn to attractive people first. Personality is important but unless we make the most of our first impression with new people we meet, often we won’t get a second chance.

Personality eventually trumps looks if we are given the time to display what we have to offer. People who maybe were less attractive to begin with, become more attractive as you get to know them. In reality the “attraction factor” depends on two things; a great first impression and a winning personality as the relationship deepens.

At a jam session I attended with a friend recently, a man came in who looked like he was down and out and could have been homeless. With an unkempt, long beard and hair, crooked teeth, baggy clothes, (it was dark so I couldn’t tell how clean they were), I probably would not have even looked at him, had it not been for my friend’s enthusiatic reception of him. Then he jumped up on the stage and began to play the guitar and sing. Amazed at his talent but shocked at the first impression he made, I did take the time to talk with him after the set. He was a wonderful, intelligent man.

In most cases, especially in a business situation, you would not have that second chance. Taking the time to present yourself in the best possible light, utilizing dress, grooming and language, is always worth the effort. Prospective employers, future friends or mates will be drawn to you rather than repelled.

I’ve heard people say that “If they don’t like me the way I am naturally, I don’t need them in my life”. That may be true in a perfect world. However, I am sure you will agree that we all have some prejudices where appearance is concerned. It does matter if we want that new client, that new job or a promotion.

Realistically, who would you choose if you were deciding to spend your hard earned money or were hiring for a position in your company. Think about the people you have met recently and what your first impression of them was. How did they look? Were they well groomed, just presentable or scruffy. How did they speak? Did they use correct grammar, slang or were they vulgar. Did they arrive early, just barely on time or were they late?

Ralph Waldo Emerson said that “Who you are speaks so loudly, I can’t hear what you are saying”. I believe no truer words were ever spoken. If we want to move up in our careers, set an example for our children, show our friends and family how important they are to us, then we owe it to ourselves to take the time to present ourselves in the best possible light.

Decisions Then Action…

Have you ever set those New Year’s resolutions that after a week or two fall by the way side? What truly makes the difference between those that succeed and those that don’t? This year has been different for me. I believe that is because of the work I have been doing around the Law of Attraction and the Law of Allowing. I can see the changes I want to happen so clearly in my mind that they are manifesting in my life. One of my goals has always been (after having 3 kids) is to get back into phenomenal shape. One of my motivators currently is a trip to France in March visit my daughter. The other is to turn heads when I wear a bathing suit. Those have never been enough before however, because I could not visualize as clearly as I can today. Since Jan 20th I have been watching my diet like I have in the past and have broken through the blocks that have kept me above a certain weight for more than 15 years. The feeling of achievment is wonderful. The better I feel the faster the pounds seem to melt off. That being said it has also generated the desire to stay physically fit as well. So I have now incorporated yoga, cardio and weights into my daily regime.

Since the weight has been coming off the reactions of other people have been interesting. Comments about “You don’t want to get too thin” or “You don’t need to lose weight” make me laugh now because I realize that their comments are based on the fact that they have not been able to achieve what I am doing. My weight loss is not a criticism of them, merely something I have become passionate about and because of that am seeing results that I have never seen before. The comments used to bother me before because i took them personally. With the personal growth I have been doing, I accept that my reality is different than theirs and that I no longer have the desire to please them. What is most important is the personal guidance of my emotions… if I feel good then I will attract more of the same.

…More on the Law of Allowing

Imagine… you have just lost your job but you have decided that you are going to look at the positive aspects of it. “If I wanted to feel good about this, what would be good? Well… it opens the door to all sorts of possibilites, self employment, a new job that might be more interesting, some time off, maybe a trip to France to see my daughter” Already I am getting a bit excited! So needless to say my mood was great and stayed great UNTIL l RAN INTO SOME FRIENDS! They love me, truly they do. “Are you ok? What are you going to do without a steady income? You didn’t get any severance? You need to talk to someone about this!” I told them, I really was ok and excited about the possibilities!

Have you ever noticed that even when you say you are ok, and if they are coming from a place of fear, that fear is contagious. You may not notice the change in your energy right away, I didn’t. All I knew was, that I felt slightly uneasy after I left to go home. I took me an hour or so to realize that I had “bought into” their fear. So what do you do then?

Monitoring your emotions seems to be critical if you want the Law of Allowing to work. Noticing how you feel will determine whether you manifest great things in your life or not. As I said before if the results don’t change, then we have been focusing on the same old, same old. So.. I spent some time focusing on, “If I could feel good about this, what could be good.” I came up with another list of things that excited me and the fear dissipated. I guess it just takes being aware of what emotions you are feeling. So though it may take some conscious effort, the Law of Allowing is simple, once we decide to pay attention to how we feel emotionally on a daily or even an hourly basis.

The Law of Allowing..

It’s interesting that you hear the same message for years and years and yet you never really hear it. Our ability to attract what we want is always happening.. if we don’t see any changes in our lives, it’s not because we haven’t attracted anything, it’s that we have attracted the same old thing. This is extremely exciting to me because I think I finally got it. Abraham says that our emotions are our guide to our ability to allow or manifest what we desire. If we feel good we allow that good to come to us. How often, in the past, have I had a negative thought and felt uneasy or upset. That is what Abraham says “pinches us off from Source”. So for the past 2 weeks I have been practicing… an uncomfortable feeling comes up and I change my focus… if I could feel good what would that feel like. All of a sudden I am on a tangent of feel good emotions and life is good again. It seems so simple and really it is. Because of this the last two weeks have been amazing even though my full time employment was recently terminated. It’s an opening for exciting new things, new employment opportunities with new friends, a change of scenery, and definitely a trip to France to see my daughter. Life couldn’t be better!

Speed of Abundance…

The emails rolled in at an amazing rate. I was shocked how fast it all happened. I have lots of new customers as well as new prospective business associates. Luckily my systems were in place and I was able to respond personally to everyone that emailed me.

 

That got me to thinking, if the power of the mind can create things so quickly why don’t people harness it more often. Like most viewers I watched the Secret and thought, “Isn’t this great?” I did what they talked about for awhile and then I stopped. The real secret to the Secret is taking action along with the belief that things will turn out the way you want them to.

 

Abraham talks about the Law of Allowing and that we constantly are creating. So if things don’t change for us, it is because we continue to create the same old things. What we feel we deserve causes us to sometimes sabotage our best laid plans. Unfortunately, see that in myself on a daily basis. So from today on, I am going to make a concerted effort to mediate and visualize twice a day for 20 min.

 

In the past when I have meditated regularly I’ve noticed and increase in my intuitive ability and life really does flow more easily. If my last experience with expecting abundance is any indication, this month promises a whirlwind ride!

Manifesting…

This week has been extremely interesting. Speaking with friend the other day I mentioned that I have been focusing on manifesting an easy and profitable business. I said “I want people to come to me, I want it to be fun and easy.” That was Wednesday morning… Thursday afternoon the emails started to roll in requesting samples from my free sample page. I called my friend excitedly saying there were over 300 requests. Amazed, you bet! Both of us were. Today, just a few days later I have had over 1400 emails from people intersted in my products. I have had orders from people as far north as Nunavut and from coast to coast. I am excited to see what the next few weeks will bring.

Law of Attraction…

The law of Attraction states that we draw to us those circumstances and things that best decribe our thoughts and feelings at the time.

Thoughts Have Energy!
Entertain for a moment the idea that thoughts have energy. If thoughts do have energy, is it possible that they can cause a ripple effect, changing the people around you? Have you noticed that around people who are energized, excited and enjoying life, often the energy is contagious!

I remember a time when my 17 year old daughter and I were not getting along well and some of the thoughts I had about her at that time were not at all motherly or loving. I’ve often wondered how much I contributed to the problem with my attitude. Of course I was courteous in her presence however those teen years can be horrendous so, for awhile, we did not speak much. I couldn’t imagine I had ever given birth to this “person”!

Then one day when I was at my wits end with her, I walked into my bedroom. Angry, hurt and not sure where to go or what to do, I saw a picture someone had placed on the end of my bed. It was a picture of my little girl when she was about 4 years old. White blonde hair, big blue eyes and tanned skin, she smiled up at me from the picture. I had forgotten that the person living in my house was this beautiful child that I loved so much. My heart softened and I started to cry.

At that moment I realized I really needed an attitude adjustment. I made an effort to see her through new eyes, to see her as that beautiful baby I loved so very much! The amazing thing was that as the days passed and as I treated her with love, the relationship came back. Miraculously, I did nothing else other than change the thoughts I had about her.

We all know that the teen years can be so difficult and the self esteem in which they hold themselves can be so fragile. What they truly need from us as parents, is the love and encouragement we needed at that age too. The time with them is so short that every effort we make in their behalf is truly worth the effort.

Manifesting and Action…

The Power of Self Mastery …if you could have anything you wanted in life by committing to a plan for 30 days, would you take on an audacious challenge? Tao Te Ching once said, “Mastering others is strength. Mastering yourself is true power.”

I have set some huge goals for the year and have seen numerous small indicators that the thoughts we carry create our results. Over time, with practice, you will see things materialize that will amaze you. The key here, is focus, I think. This is not to say that all you have to do is think about something. Rather by thinking and focusing you set to work a process in your mind that allows your creatvity to come through. From the ideas generated or manifested, you willl want to take action. Lately, I’ve been thinking about how to generate more sales over the internet.The other day I was sent an email from a mailing list I receive on a regular basis. I usually delete them, however that day I actually opened it. Inside was an offer I couldn’t refuse.. .for $1. Someone had stolen Matt’s marketing material and he decided to let people have it basically for free. The dollar he collected from everyone was to go to Habitat for Humanity. The whole purpose of this offer on his part, was to put the guy who stole his marterial out of business. From the strategies I learned from him I put a plan into action and I am now seeing a concrete increase in my client base. What it means is that we can manifest things or ideas however sometimes there are a couple of steps involved and it is up to us to take action.

So this blog is going to be an experiment, to see exactly what I can create over the next year.

Welcome…

Hi
This blog is dedicated to the use of the Secret and the Law of Attraction to achieve personal and business goals. I would love to hear any stories or successes you have had too! It’s all about the journey… and how to make every moment count. Leave me a message
Dale